Archive | October, 2010
To the Poser Drug Poetry Boy in First Period
I wrote a poem about drugs today but it wasn’t as cool as your poem about cocaine or marijuana or any of the legal but prescription medications you steal from your parents’ medicine cabinet, grind up, and snort through a straw off the back of your binder before first period. No, my poem’s just about […]
Robot Dinosaur Magazine Submission Guidelines
Robot Dinosaur Magazine is open to submissions year-round. We accept all genres, including literary, experimental, sci-fi, horror and fantasy. Romance is a tough sell, but if you can knock our socks off with a romantic tale about robot dinosaurs, then by all means, send it our way. Your submission should not exceed five thousand words. Although […]
Haiku
I sit on the couch Today, thinking of haikus. Nothing comes to mind. Wait, here’s one: Birds choke and die on the gum I spit out on the street, where they croak. I think I must be the greatest hunter on earth: all the gum I chew!
The Devil Wears Aubergine
I’m sick and tired of all the blathering about obesity and weight loss. It’s everywhere — in my inbox, on TV, and in every magazine I pick up. “Choose to live free of fat!” “Discover the real you — the thin you.” “Lose 20 pounds in 4 days! Guaranteed.” With all those fat-free foods and diets and […]
Ironic Invasion
Windstar
Windstar was never the same after transforming and forgetting that James was still inside.
Review Copy
When I picked it up, His manuscript smelled Strongly, of fish. That, he said, must be All the carping criticism
Chinese Whispers in American Intelligence
Iranian Defector: Iran is ten years away from building an atomic bomb. Case Officer: Iran is ten years away from building an atomic bomb. Intelligence Analyst: Iran is ten years away from building an atomic bomb. Director of National Intelligence: Iran is ten years away from building an atomic bomb. Former Vice-President Dick Cheney: Iran has mounted hundreds of atomic […]
Rule
A voice echoed sharply through the hallowed halls, The Vatican issued a statement on inflatable dolls. Those who follow the Catholic faith will certainly be elated, Plastic dolls are okay as long as they are not inflated. On another subject near to heart, Bible quotes are produced — S&M is okay, as long as sex […]