Author Archive | Michael Spring

Answers to Last Month’s Quiz

Here are the answers to last month’s quiz. Some of you found this challenging. The million dollars is still unclaimed. 1. The gall bladder of an egret. 2. While skiing in the Alps (specifically, in G sharp minor). 3. A trick question! You probably answered “an oil-based compound and morphia combined,” but the actual answer is every Pope […]

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Obituary for Vana Van Vama: Film Actress

Vana van Vama was born Mucha Laya, in the small town of Tapas, in the west of Argentina. While in her early teens, she was placed under the tenor, Roderiguez, an experience which she later described in her autobiography, “Virgin on the Rocks”, as ‘formative’. It was Roderiguez who memorably cast her as “The Angel” […]

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Rejection and Acceptance: As Dealt with by a Poet

REJECTION I received today, your rejection notice Together with the copy of your So-called magazine. Tell me, which of your contributors Are you sleeping with? All of them I suspect, from The quality of your lacklustre journal. I’ve looked at the fiction section And Dickens it ain’t. As for the poetry, I can only imagine […]

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It’s a Dog’s Life

God knows, ruling can be difficult enough Without the continuous shouting (“What news on the Rialto?!”) The flooded streets, The artists perpetually petitioning commissions (“My ceiling is done already, Tintoretto, And, yes, I like it white.”) Not to mention the possibility of being Stabbed in error by a moody Moor, Or dismembered by a wizened […]

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