Yoko Ono was my favourite beach boy

The Dutch come from Holland
Which is often called the Netherlands
Wooden shoes have nothing to do with milking goats in Nigeria
The Niger River is seldom mistaken for a lake by Americans with vacuum cleaners
J. Edgar Hoover preferred Mister Clean to Pinesol
I don’t wear lingerie
I can remember when thongs referred to flip flops
And when a beaver was nothing more than a waterlogged hedgehog
The turkey’s wattle is said to be tender
Fitzgerald probably cried at night
The prevalence of brain damage among elk in Northern Quebec
Has not yet been linked to the heroin trade in Afghanistan
But one day it may
April showers bring May flowers
But if the heavens open up, does that mean God pees on us
Paper houses offer protection from the elements in Japan
Yoko Ono was my favorite Beach Boy
Brian Wilson lay in bed while Neil Armstrong walked on the moon
One small step for man does not translate to one giant leap for mankind
Michael Jackson perfected the moonwalk
Newton liked to play with apples
That can get you into trouble these days
Donald was a sailor
And Daffy wore a collar
But I’m not convinced he was a priest
½ milk ½ orange-juice and a dash of pepper, when mixed, looks a lot like egg nog
But tastes like death
Some would agree that palm trees can grow from cow shit
I feel this detracts from the beauty of nature