They don’t serve breakfast at Tiffany’s

Alexander conquered the known world
Only to be murdered in cold blood by a mosquito
Neapolitan ice cream has sweetened a tyrant
Aspartame is best served with coffee and cream
and two slabs of white bread
Assless chaps should never be worn by middle aged men
Prince Charles likes to ride horses
The Naked Chef cooks with his clothes on
Dingoes enjoy raw babies
Dogs often lick their genitals
Wolf Blitzer is not a gun
Burt and Ernie are just good friends
Homo erectus had no use for Viagra
Robin Williams may be the missing link
The growth of chest hair has not yet been linked to the consumption
of broccoli, oatmeal, or sprouts
Squirrel brains are a non-essential ingredient to wonton soup
The Great Wall of China can be seen from space
So can Don King’s hair
Mike Tyson prefers soap on a rope
Nibbling on another’s ear can be a sensual experience
Banana pancakes should always be eaten in bed
They don’t serve breakfast at Tiffany’s