last week i gave up capitals
like e.e. cummings and k.d. lang
but then i remembered
how they teach you in grade one
that “I” is capitalized
because “I” am important.
though i suspect in certain social circles
i am not quite as important
as e.e. cummings
but maybe a little more
than k.d. lang.
On Tuesday I gave up meat.
But only for an hour
or so
because I realised
if I didn’t eat the steak I had there to cook,
someone else would cook it
probably well-done
which would be a disservice to the cow who once owned it.
So I ate it rare
with a nice reduction sauce.
Last Thursday, I gave up beards because
I am not a man.
And also, I cannot grow a beard,
even though I still believe in people who have them,
because, if I gave up on them
they probably wouldn’t believe in me,
like what happened in Pretty in Pink
with Molly Ringwald
and Andrew McCarthy,
only they didn’t have facial hair.
Four years ago I gave up haircuts.
After a while people started to say to me
wow. Your hair is long.
Which was true, so I liked that.
But then one day I just went and cut it
and I cried when I saw my former self
braided in a plastic bag on my desk.
though I smiled
when I looked in the mirror
and saw my new self
without my former self
there to weigh on my shoulders.
Comments are closed.