We recently asked writers and poets of every ilk to help us prove to the world that a rose by any other name is still a rose, even if it is misspelled and grammatically incorrect. A number of writers responded with glee, rewriting and bastardizing a Shakespearean play as if it were originally conceived on a Twitter feed. First-time Feathertale contributor Erik Lambert is our winner for his exquisite tweeting ofJulius Caesar.
Little Caesar @Crowded: word to my PEEPS!
Crowded @Little Caesar: holla!
Nostradamus @Little Caesar: March 15 = no
Little Caesar @Nostradamus: puhleease!
***
Cassie @Brute: LC be wantin a crown
Brute @Cassie: you been smokin 2 much
Cassie @Brute: dont h8 the truth. Ask any 1. Ill forward the emails. Scan them urself
Brute @Cassie: Rome be my home. LC has 2 go. this how we do it. see picture http://faculty.maxwell.syr.edu/gaddis/HST210/Nov6/dagger.jpg
***
Scalpurnia @Little Caesar: stay wit me tonite. I got bad vibes
Little Caesar @Scalpurnia: can’t babe. Business. kiss kiss
Cassie @Little Caesar: got surprise 4 u. come to the club so we can chat.
Little Caesar @Cassie: whatev. Lead the way.
Cassie @Brute: Its LC or us
Brute @Little Caesar: my man can u oblige and release a friend from lockup?
Little Caesar @Brute: nah. First him, then all. Got to keep my rep up
Cascade @Little Caesar: got to live while ur dyin (stabathon!)
Little Caesar @Brute: U2 Brute!? Forget this s**t. Im out. (Little Caesar signs off)
***
Brute @Crowded: FYI, this was 4 the good
Mantony @Crowded: everybody hear me now! LC and you was tight. But since u h8 him, I spose u aint need 2 see his will
Crowded @Mantony: WTF, cmon!
Mantony @Crowded: 75 c-notes and a new condo. Brute and Cassie were kind 2 keep it from u
Crowded @Brute @Cassie @Cascade: get ’em!!!!!!!
Brute @Cassie: Rome is pissed. U did this.
Cassie @Brute: duznt matter. We screwed with I, we need TEAM.
Brute @Cassie: True dat. Win first, bitch later.
Little Caesar (offline) @Brute: U gonna die sucka! C u soon!
***
Cassie @Brute: G2G. Been fun. C-ya! (Cassie signs off)
Brute @Stratosphere: What’s dun is dun. Ur a good BFF. Help a brother out. Hold ur sword up. Thnks 4 everything. Gbye. (Brute signs off)
***
Mantony @Octapus: Score 1 4 the home team. 2 bad about Brute. Least he had chutzpa to knock off LC for the right and not the greenbacks.
Octapus @Mantony: 4sure. But lets take the body. Good press.
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