Navy Spheres

these past few months have got me thinking:
i believe my pants are shrinking
they have gotten tighter, wee-er
(certainly they are less free-er)
and it’s gotten to the point
they are hurting all my joints
but not just that, the worst of all
is they’re clamping on my balls
cutting off the circulation
to my tadpole fabrication

and from this pain, i am deducing:
pants don’t want me reproducing
which really is not so bad
(i’ve never wished to be a dad)
all that baby barf and pee
was really never meant for me
so i am rather pleased to see
my dear raiments do agree

so to my pants both long and short:
i thank you all for your support
and please keep flattering my bum
just take your zips off my scrotum

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