An oxymoron is not a retarded bull

Poorly aged ice cream tastes stringy
Poorly aged people do not
Nothing says dementia like Depends-wrapped mustard seeds
under the Christmas Tree
Nothing says Liza Minnelli like birthday wishes
written in mascara on a liquor receipt
That a human in a ferret suit can be spawned from a darling is somewhat impressive
That I can’t do the cancan is not
They say Dick Tracy never soiled his briefs to match his fedora
And that Old Yeller never peed on the rug
But they don’t tell you Errol Flynn’s dog never mastered the goose step
Paprika and minced lamb should not be consumed in the bedroom
Catherine the Great was loved by a horse
Whips and chapped leather are popular among academics in Indiana
It’s commonly understood that academia is uncommon in Newfoundland
Belgians are the butt of most jokes in Europe
Waffles are best served with a side of sprouts by a Walloon waiter
with three hairs on his chin
Prairie oysters are a delicacy among genteel Albertans
An oxymoron is not a retarded bull
That butterflies hate margarine with a fiery-passion is hyperbole
That bad puns go generally unpunished is not

Comments are closed.